- Race
- Religion
- Sexuality
- Physical Disability
- Mental Illness
These are the main categories. But, please contact me if you can think of any that I have missed. I shall deal with these one by one.
Race
So, you're brought up in a white only neighbourhood in a semi-rural area. One day you see someone with a different colour skin and wearing clothing different to what you usually see. This is an era before home computers and the Internet, so you have never been exposed to people of different races before. The natural reaction would be of fear...wait...rewind...actually MY natural reaction was of interest and wonder. This is because I am describing the first time I saw someone of a different race. It was a beautiful Indian lady wearing a colourful sari. She happened to be walking down the street in a nearby town to where I lived. Now everyone in my neighbourhood was white and all the kids I went to school with where white. Not because of some sort of apartheid or segregation, but because this was a small town in the north west of England circa 1974. The cities had had a lot of different nationalities as part of their makeup for years, but I wasn't aware of this when I was 4 years old. So, why was my reaction that of interest and not of fear? Because my mother was a completely unbiased, unprejudiced, she embraced diversity and loved the human race with all its differences, so she had brought me up with the same attitudes. It is parents that usually inculcate their own prejudices into their children, children are not born that way.
Interestingly, my father IS a bigot. He uses racist and bigoted language all the time. I hate it. He hates a lot of people. I used to see the difference between my mum's calm demeanour as she talked to people no matter what their nationality and my dad's stressed out, hate filled bigotry. He would use demeaning, racist and generally obnoxious language about so many people. I didn't like it. It didn't make any sense. They were just people from another part of the world who happened to be here now, so what?
When I then moved to London, I discovered that there were so many diverse people. It was fascinating. But I also came across a phenomenon that I was unprepared for. Some people who had a different skin colour to mine were very wary of me and almost hostile. It took me a while to figure out what the problem was. Then I realised that they were protecting themselves. They assumed that I would hate them because I was white and they weren't. As a child this made me feel sad. But I never changed my attitude towards them and ended up friends with quite a few people who had not liked me to start with.
One of the groups within the UK that seems to get forgotten are the travellers/gypsies. It seems to be the ethic group that its "okay" to hate. Newsflash: its NOT. They are human too. Just because they have a different culture doesn't make them bad people or less than human. And before we get to some of the "drinking and fighting" stereotypes, have you ever been to the centre of a city when the clubs are throwing out their customers at closing time? Perhaps both the settled and the traveller communities have the same problems at times. But shouldn't that make us realise that we are all human rather than condemning one section of society? If you are unaware of the issues surrounding the gypsy/traveller communities or would like to help/support in some way see the Friends, Families and Travellers website.
Under the skin we're all the same. Blood, flesh and bone. We all belong to the same race, the human race. We are all tied to mother earth in the same way. We are all interdependent on her and each other.
I find different cultures fascinating. I just wish that I was able to travel more. I was able to visit Tunisia back in the 1990s. It was so totally different to what I was used to, it was amazing. There are different ways of living that are all equality valid. I am not referring to politics, I am referring to culture.
Religion
Oh boy, now this is a really divisive one. Unfortunately, some of the main stream religions over the years haven't helped. Lets face it, when you are told that your religion is the "only true religion" and all others are false it is going to kind of make you prejudiced. Firstly, I want to state that when I refer to religion I am talking about the ordinary men and women who practice their various faiths around the world, I am NOT talking about the large organised religions who over the centuries have fostered hate and sponsored war.
What do you believe? Now even if you don't believe in an organised religion you will have some beliefs. Even if those beliefs are that there is no god(s). Even if you are an agnostic, there will still be certain things that you are happy to concede are probably true about the universe and how it came to be.
So in my opinion, because religion/agnosticism/atheism is a matter of faith (no matter what some people will say it is not a matter of proof, if it was we would all believe the same thing), we should respect each other's basic human right to have their own opinion, i.e. belief. Lets face it, you wouldn't like it if someone told you that you couldn't believe what you wanted to, so why should you think its okay to do that to others?
We may disagree with each other with what we believe but surely that is one of the amazing abilities of being human, to discuss, to debate, to agree to disagree.
Sexuality
So what does it matter? Oh boy this is a hot potato at the moment. I'm not sure why, but it seems to stem from the inability of certain people to allow others to have their own beliefs (see heading of Religion). I am not aware of any non-religious groups that are campaigning to stop equal rights for the LGBTQ community, but if there are I am happy to hear from anyone who has details.
It appears to have become a hot issue again due to so many countries beginning to address the issue of Gay Marriage. What is known as the "far right", i.e. conservative and usually strictly religious groups are terrified that somehow everyone is going to turn gay. They don't believe that people are born with their respective sexualities set from birth. They DO believe that you can somehow "pray away the gay" (personally think that's a hilarious saying).
I just need to point something out here in defense of people who are very strictly religious and who think that how LGBTQ people live their lives is against "god's" law. My mother was an intensely religious person and this was her belief. BUT it didn't make her prejudiced against LGBTQ people. She worked for a lesbian couple (she was their housekeeper/cleaner), she knew they were lesbians (at one point I thought she didn't realise), but she said to me that it didn't matter because it was "up to them, that they were lovely people, so it wasn't up to her to judge." She became quite close friends with them too. So you see not every strictly religious person is a bigot - just remember this too.
At this point I have a couple of links that I really want to share with you:
In the name of "curing" children and adolescents, these extreme groups are committing child abuse. So do you think that bigotry is just a bit of name calling now?
Young LGBTQ people are more likely to commit suicide too. Is this due to them being "confused" over their sexuality? No, its due to the ABUSE they receive from others (be warned this next video does contain bad language, but it gets the message across!):
Physical disability
"Look at him, he walks funny!" and the boy's friends point, laugh and generally make the gentleman with the walking stick and awkward gait feel very uncomfortable and threatened in his own community. Thirty years ago that same man had been a punk, with a huge green mohican and a safety pin through his nose. He had been at the forefront of fashion and the music scene. Now, kids take the piss out of him and there's nothing he can do.* The arrogance of youth makes it easy for us to point out the less perfect in society. Parents who bring their kids up without respect for others make it easy for their kids to point out the kid in wheelchair and laugh.
But, think again. What if you had an accident? What if your little brother or sister did? What if they ended up with a physical disability? Would you disown them? What about if you or someone you know was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis or Motor Neuron disease? What would you do?
When you are walking down the road and you have to move out of the way for someone in a wheelchair, perhaps instead of deliberately ignoring them and avoiding eye contact, smile at them. They are human too. They won't all smile back because not everyone on this planet is friendly, but you will have treated them with dignity and we should all be treated with dignity.
Mental Illness
"Spaz", "nutter", "mental case", "loony", do you cringe? There are so many facets to mental illness that you may be surprised to realise that the majority of people on this planet will, at some point, suffer from some sort of mental illness. Yes, perhaps even you. Depression is one of the great debilitators and something that is rarely properly understood even by those who suffer from it. There is still a taboo surrounding any sort of mental illness as if the person who has the illness is contagious and subnormal and will make any who come into contact with them the same way.
There are those who don't believe that there is any kind of mental illness whatsoever and it is just various forms of laziness or oddness of character. Perhaps these people might want to explain this theory to someone with schizophrenia or bipolar disorder whilst they are hearing voices in their heads, yeah...I don't think it would work either. There are those who agree that there are mental illnesses but that think that they can be controlled purely through therapy and that psychiatric drugs are not needed. Once again, tell that to the terrified patient hearing the voices who just want them to go away.
The fact of the matter is that depression affects a lot of people and it is a mental illness. It doesn't make you "mad" or "bad", and it can be treated effectively so that the majority of people never need to suffer the agony again. But for a minority of people mental illness is a daily part of their lives that will never go away. They live with an illness that they have no control over (yes that's right, they can't choose to turn off the depression or the mania, or the psychosis) and they live with the stigma of this illness.
There are various mental illnesses including personality disorders, but the main illnesses that most people have probably heard of are schizophrenia and bipolar disorder (previously known as manic depression). There are so many misconceptions about these illnesses that, I feel that most of the prejudices surrounding people who are ill are due to fear of the unknown. Everyone should be educated to find out exactly what these illnesses are and how they affect people. Because anyone can become mentally ill. Anyone.
Schizophrenia is not a case of having a split personality, it's a group of symptoms, not all of which are experienced by all schizophrenic patients. Not all people with schizophrenia become a "danger to society" which is one of the greater fears among communities and uneducated people. Untreated illness such as this can cause the patient's mind to play tricks which can cause violent behaviour, but this is the exception rather than the rule in my experience. It is usually that the person becomes very afraid and paranoid, fearing that everyone is their enemy. It is important that treatment is sought and continued once the person is feeling better. It is also very important that friends and family do not tell the person that they're okay now so should stop taking their medication. The reason that they are okay is because of the medication. They need support and understanding from those around them. For more information about schizophrenia visit the MIND website.
Belittling, talking down to, or just ignoring someone as if they are not there is a horrible way to treat anyone. So don't do it to someone who suffers with a mental illness. They're not stupid, they're ill!!
Bipolar Disorder is another misunderstood illness. Previously known as manic depression, people have been known to make comments such as "oh I must be a bit bipolar as I'm so up and down at the moment", or "I'm acting like a complete manic depressive!" That there are two "polar opposites" to this illness is very true, but it isn't as straight forward as saying that someone is either really depressed or really happy. The manic phase of the illness can be just as frightening and damaging as the depressive phase. The racing thoughts and uncontrolled behaviour can cause many problems.
Once again, therapy on its own is not going to help the individual with bipolar to become productive. Medication can help balance the brain chemistry and therapy can be of assistance to help the patient learn to cope with the stresses of life in a different way. People with Bipolar Disorder are more likely to have a high IQ and be high achievers. There are many well known personalities such as Stephen Fry and Ruby Wax who have Bipolar Disorder.
There is a fantastic blog written by a lady who has Bipolar Disorder called The Diary of a Certified Nutter. Please take the time to read it, it is intelligent and articulate and very interesting!
If someone tells you that they have a psychiatric illness, don't shy away. If you know nothing about it, find out about it. There is no such thing as too much knowledge, it will help you to become a well rounded, unbiased, educated and attractive human being.
There is nothing attractive about being a bigot. Ugly is as ugly does.
* this is a fictional scenario to illustrate the problem
